Christmas 2009

I think this Christmas has surpassed most any other Christmas out there! Why? Why Not? We started the celebration off by none other than the awesomest Christmas Openhouse! John had never been to such a thing... honestly not many people have. I don't really know of many people that live in a house with a huge pipe organ in it. I don't think we had as many people come this year as other years past...but that's A-OK with me! Just means more rolls, ham, meatballs, chips and dip, and cookies for me :)

Next we rolled into Christmas Eve with John coming to hang out with us for Christmas Eve Dinner :) Pot Roast, Vegetables, Salad, Rolls.. seriously I wish we ate this well everyday! The Taylor's came over, as well as my Sister and her fabulous family, it ROCKED! (I would have snapped a few photos of all of this, unfortunately my camera had a "falling out" and no longer exists)

Christmas morning we headed over to Heidi and Brian's for the opening of the gifts, and the best Brunch possible. This year we started a new tradition. Not only was John there, but a great friend came. Melanie is the AWESOMEST of AWESOME and I just absolutely adore her! Thanks for coming Melanie! By the time Brunch was over, we were stuffed to the brim with biscuits and gravy, sausage, hashbrowns, bacon, scrambled eggs, belgium waffles, orange juice, and raspberry crumb cake. Honestly I believe I am still full! We all headed in our various directions, and my parents, John, and myself went back to have our own little present party...Sweaters, Cameras, Drill Bit sets, Pictures, Nerf Guns, and much more were thrown around our house. (yes I got a camera) Later, John and I packed up and headed for is side of town-

Des and Ty seemed pretty happy with the gifts that they were given, and we had the very much expected 30 minute nerf war afterward. Following this fun filled, sometimes a little dangerous event, we went to see the grandparents, and eat at the parents' home. Did I mention we were still full? By the time we returned, I wanted a nap but no one else did, so we played Twists and Turns of Life, Animal Crossing, Monopoly, Nerf Tag, Lego Starwars...and the best part...John let Des put make-up on him!!! I would've taken a picture of this awesome, never seen event...but I am afraid myself or the camera wouldn't have made it back in one piece to share the story! It was cool! The next best part was Des falling asleep mid-sentence at about 2:30 a.m. This is a weekend that I could have put on repeat several times over and never been sick of!

Saturday, Des decided she was done hanging out with us, so John, Ty and I drove back to Salt Lake, hung out at my house for a bit before going with the whole family (Melanie included) to see The Princess and The Frog. If you haven't seen it yet, GO SEE IT! The only thing that could've made it better is if we didnt' have to park 3 miles from the theater and if John hadn't gotten sick during/afterward (poor guy)

Here are just a few of the photos that did make it back with me ;)

Heading to get the kids...

Ty with the most favorite toy! Watch Out!!!!

After Des painted John's face...and mine...I painted hers!

Ty had so much fun...it was nap time on the way to my house :)

I  (Heart) them All!!!

Because he is hurting...I am hurting.

Today, we both need this. It is a beautiful reminder that we are not alone, no one is alone. Our best friend and Savior is with us always. Loves us and cares for us, we just need to open our hearts and let him in.




Be still my soul, The Lord is on thy side
With patience bear thy cross of grief or pain
Leave to thy God to order and provide
In every change he faithful will remain
Be still my soul, thy best, thy heavenly friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end

Be still my soul, thy God doth undertake.
To guide the future as he has the past.
Thy hope thy confidence let nothing shake
All now mysterious shall be bright at last
Be still my soul, The waves and winds still know
His voice who rulded them while he dwelt below.

Be still my soul, The hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone
Sorrows forgot loves purest joys restored
Be still my soul, When change and tears are past
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

You know your boyfriend loves you when...

He gets his "good jeans" dirty, just to make sure your car is safe.

He is excited to spend time with your family, even though you are still at work.

He drives you to every appointment you have in a day...even though none of them are remotely near each other. And he looks at you and says, " I am having a great day! Thanks for being with me."

He is not afraid to be near you, even if you do have some contagious illness.

The scars from your evil cat don't bother him.

He loves your evil cat, and the kitten too!

He watches a "chick flick" on Wednesday night, and goes to Disney On Ice Princess Classics on Thursday. And when the show is over, he leans over, kisses you and says. "that was great, we need to come next year!"

He surprises you with a Tinkerbell doll, just because. Doesn't matter that you are not a kid anymore, he thinks it is still cool.

He offers you his coat in the rain, while it is freezing because " You are shaking like a leaf babe, we need to get you warm!"

He turns around when you are half way to your destination, drives you all the way back home, just so you can get something you need.

He tells you he loves you every day!

Thanks John!
XOXOXOX

Halloween...yes, it's late, but who cares!

Halloween this year was not just fun, it was nice! It has been over two years since I have actually enjoyed this holiday...dressing up and going to parties when you don't have someone to go with is not all that desireable! John was a great sport, better than most would be...but honestly, it was him that started it all, so he HAD to be a good sport!

We went to Erin and Merrits Costume Ball the week before the famous day of goblins, ghosts and trick-or-treating, it was so nice to celebrate their 10 year anniversary with them! See that's where John's whole costume got started! We were talking about parties and halloween, when John said. "well maybe I'll just show up in a tutu!" I wished I had come up with the marvelous idea myself...but alas, I did not! I said  "That would be AWESOME!" He laughed and thought nothing of it. Well, I was chatting with Erin, who wanted to know more about awesome John, and I said, "well why don't you just ask him when he shows up to your party in  a tutu and fairy wings?" Yay!!!! John so my little message, and even though he probably, well I'm sure really didn't want to do it, he said I could make him a tutu and we could buy him some wings! I love this guy!

I didn't get the tutu done in time for Erin's party, and when we tried to put John's wings on, we quickly realized they would not fit. It was actually one of the funniest things I have seen, watching him try to put on purple fairy wings with elastics that were nearly not big enough to go around my shoulders, let alone my "manly man."

Dont' worry though, my awesome sister helped me with the Tutu- and I was able to get it done for Halloween party number 3. Number two I went alone, since the tutu fairy had to work. Thanks John for being such a great guy, and great sport! Next year I promise I won't make you wear the tutu!

Aren't we Cute?!????? I am still fighting with glitter!

Awww!

Rob and Heather...Guardian Angels

Nate...he is some Anime dude...I really wanted a picture of him standing up, the costume is AWESOME!

Chris- my "other brother" and his main Squeeze.

Beth and Scott, sporting Zorro and...what's his wife's name?

Next year, halloween will totally rock!

Things I've been up to....

Again, I am a neglectful blogger. One of these days I will get better...maybe. So what have I been up to you ask? hmmm...let's see:

.

Shooting with the Hottest guy around...

Costume Ball with the funnest guy ever!

Hanging out with Him... John. He's AWESOME!

So, that's what I've been up to. Along with...

Helping Cleo out with This little guy...

Isn't he Cute?!?!??????

He needs a name! Any suggestions?

Max

Here's my little Max. What a cute kitten! I don't know what happened, why he had to go...maybe he missed his sister Ruby too much...maybe he wanted to see his grandma again. Whatever the reason, Max left this world on September 30th, 2009. He was the runt of the litter, but definitely made up for it in voice. You could hear little Max all the way downstairs, and he made sure his emotions were known! Sleep my little Max

Life's Lessons...

September 12, one of the most tiring and exciting days ever!




Cleo woke me up at about 3 a.m. and I knew that I was in for and ordeal! Her belly went from barely noticeably pregnant, to on the verge of exploding in a matter of a week, and as excited as I was to see her little ones, I felt bad that she looked so miserable too! I thought that part of it would run like clock work. You know, the part where you get the box all ready, and cat just instinctively knows that she is supposed to have her babies and keep them safe in there? The one that she's sat in a few times, slept in, and seemed to understand, at least in your head, when you told her "this is where you have your babies". Not so. Cleo's plan was different. She didn't want to have them in the box, she wanted to have them in none other than my garment drawer! See, she knows how to open my dresser drawers, she does it all the time, little sneak! Luckily for me, she finally consented, after a little help of coaxing her by me, and closing the closet door when she finally came in! Lesson number 1: Patience generally pays off in the end, and a door can definitely help!

By 6:15, we had baby number 1! born tail end first, and covered in goo- Cleo was doing a great job cleaning her off, until baby cried. It totally freaked her out! she looked at me like, "what the crap am I supposed to do with it?!?!" Didn't help that she was still in labor. The next two kittens came together, tail-ends first again...one was stillborn, but oh so beautiful! Cleo did a much better job with those two...well the living one, seems to be that when a cat has a baby that passed on before it was born...they know not to do anything with it.

I was thinking that she was done, I mean she's a very small cat how many kittens could there be really? Guess there were more. the fourth one came (you guessed it, tail first) and it sadly as well, was stillborn. I learned lesson number 2: Always look on the bright side. Two is better than one!

After the 4th kitten, Cleo curled up and started taking care of her little ones. I was pretty sure this was the end, since she was more relaxed than before...but you never know with Bengals...I took the two precious angels outside to give their bodies a resting place on earth...and by the time I got back in the house, I hear Cleo call for me again...I ran upstairs to find her needing help with baby number five :) Tail first, body stuck, and who knew that sometimes they come before the placenta instead of in it! Lesson number 3: Nature has a way of taking its own course.

(sorry if the pics gross you out...I think they are awesome)
1 girl and 2 boys...what a sweet little litter. What wasn't sweet about it? Well, my little Cleo doesn't want to be left alone! She believes that if I am home, I MUST be in the closet stroking her and telling her what a great mommy she is! Seriously, from Saturday at 3 until Sunday at 2 a.m. I was able to catch ZERO sleep. I ended up grabbing my pillows, and sleeping in the closet-well trying to sleep in the closet..every time I would start to doze off, I got a nice set of teeth in my hand, letting me know that sleeping wasn't appreciated, nor was it going to be tolerated. I was on the verge of tears by the time 8 a.m. rolled around. Lesson #4: Motherhood, even if it is to a cat, can be extremely painful!


Now, today is Wednesday. These beautiful babies have been here four days, and my heart has grown around each and every one of them. NOTE: If you aren't in the mood to read or hear sad things, stop reading this post NOW!!!

I came home today, after picking up more cat food, and I myself being a little under the weather...to find that the sweet little female kitten that was born first, had passed away.
It tears at my heartstrings. I have no idea why she didn't survive, she seemed to be doing ok. But I guess her little body, whatever it had gone through, couldn't do it anymore. I was definitely in shock, and thought I was handling it ok, especially when I took this picture of her, up until the point that Cleo came up, and grabbed her to take her back to the box! My heart was wide open. There was a mommy, wanting nothing more than her baby. With big tears in my eyes, I told her "I am sorry, but she is no longer with us! I am sorry my sweet Cleo!" I am usally quite sure when she understands me. She at least humors me so I think she understands me...this time she did not understand. She cried and howled all the way down the stairs, as I carried her little one. I hear her behind the door, begging me not to take her, and I did it anyway. My wide-open heart was now not only wide-open, but it was tearing in every direction. My cat's heart was broken, and mine was broken with it. My nieces came to stay with me for the evening in the midst of all this...They helped me pick out a spot to bury this little one. They hugged me, and told me how sorry they were... Madison named her Ruby. We prayed for Ruby, and we prayed for Cleo. We even prayed that Kokoro would help little Ruby and keep her safe for us! Then, Reagan looked at me and said, "Auntie? I am so sorry about your Cat! Can you keep another one so you not be sad????" I wish I could Reagan...but you know, you make me happy!

So in this very long story, I learned many more lessons besides the first four. I learned today that love knows no bounds, and that I am truly very tender-hearted and have a hard time letting go. When I love, I love deeply and fiercly. I learned that even in the saddest of times, there is always hope, that a prayer from a young child, can mean more in the world than any prayer I could give. I learned that no matter how tough or happy my exterior is.. it must be needed to protect my sensitive heart. I learned that those many hours that I have spent "in the closet" with Cleo, I wouldn't give a single one up, nor will I give up the many more hours that I will be in there, as she is still not thrilled to be alone. I learned that no matter how much I love, I always have room to love more. And I learned that my heart can and will be sewn back together, as long as I trust in my Heavenly Father, and Savior Jesus Christ. Tonight I cry, but tomorrow I Smile!

Update-Not Really

Many people have asked what was ever found out about my stomach. The answer is, absolutely nothing yet! I go in for a EGD Scope on September 8th, and after that I"m sure I'll have to wait several weeks for the results. Hopefully they will be able to tell me something useful..like what is wrong with my gut- now isn't that a concept!

Through it all I am trying to keep a level head, and a positive outlook on things. Life doesn't stop just because I am waiting for one stepping stone in my life to not seem so big. What am I doing you ask? Here's this weeks list!

The Gym. That's right. After several weeks of not exercising because I puke afterwards, I have laced up my running shoes and gone back to work out, even if it does mean puking later. I wasn't just getting weaker physically, mentally I was going stir crazy! I try to make sure that I don't push myself to the breaking point, just get enough in that I feel productive and happy. My goal so far is getting there at least two times per week.

Martial Arts. I never stopped going to classes, never stopped helping out, and probably never will. I don't do the "work out" at class though-for some reason it is less embarassing to puke in front of strangers than it is to puke in front of friends! Maybe that's because whether strangers talk about it for the next ten years or not, I will not care because I don't know them, as opposed to friends who think it is a great story to tell for the rest of your life. I am also taking on my own America's Youth classes in a couple of weeks. Yes, I am daring to step out on my own and try my hand at teaching young minds great and valuable things. Woohoo!

Chiropractor. I cannot say enough of about great Chiropractors! Just like any great healthcare provider, once you find a fantastic one, you do everything you can to stay with them. They are the ones who are helping me to keep functioning not only through the gut thing, but also my normal every day activities :)

Massage. Everyone deserves a fabulous massage...there's nothing better, I just wish I could get them as often as I used to :(

Sister Missionaries. This actually should be at the top of my list, because I'm with them more than I am anywhere else. I LOVE the sister missionaries! If ever you feel as though you are at a crossroads, or in a hole, talk to them, they will help you soon realize that things aren't so dark, dismal, or annoying. I've learned more from being with them, than ever.

Cleo Patrol. Kittens are due September 5th. Yay!!! Cleo is so funny anyway, but add the pregnancy hormones in there, and she is a riot! I just wish Lucky thought so...

Well, there you have it. That's what I am doing at the moment. What next week brings, may be a different story- but so far every day is a party, and every meal is a feast!

Beef Stew and Orange Juice?

yes that is right, this is the latest and greatest test for tummy trouble! Since the HIDA scan showed that my gallbladder is A-OK, the surgeon I saw decided I should have a stomach study done. I figured it was something not so thrilling, since it had me head back to Nuclear Medicine (if they ever tell you that your test is done in Nuclear Medicine...RUN!) but I decided not to research much of what was done. Well let me tell ya! you go into the same room as the scanner, they sit you down, tell you that you are going to eat some Dinty Moore Beef Stew, and Orange Juice. Hmm. I've eaten worse, no big deal. I'm sure as kids we all ate stuff that as adults we go "GROSS!". So yeah, you get to eat that but before you eat it, they take it away, put gloves on, open a "hazard" vial and inject radiation into both the beef stew and the orange juice! YUMMY!! Just want you want at 7:20 in the morning, a hearty breakfast of radioactive meat potatoes gravy, and then wash it down with radioactive oj! Sign me up! Oh, and then they tell you that you have to eat and drink it within ten minutes or start over :(

I don't think that Beef Stew or Orange Juice will ever be on my menu again. Seriously.
What will they think of next??? Or do I not want to know....

Bittersweet...again

Today was my last day in my most favorite calling ever! I've cried for the past several days, knowing that I was about to leave the Young Women...wishing that I could stay and just add another calling to the mix- I LOVE the girls. All of them are so wonderful...and I have truly been blessed to be with them! So yes, when they released me today there were more than a few tears shed. On the same note, I am extremely excited to have the calling of "Ward Missionary". I have been going on exchanges with the sister missionaries for the past few weeks, and truly love them, and love the message of our Savior's Love for all of us that they bring. The transformation that takes place in people's lives...it is so amazing! My testimony has grown so much since Sister Wang and Sister Kololo were brought in to my life! They are such wonderful sister missionaries, and I will be sad when their journey moves them on to a different area, and even more sad when they return home to China and Samoa.

So today has been a bittersweet kind of day. I don't know what is going to happen next, but what I do know is that as long as I am doing what the Lord wants and needs me to do, I can handle it!

Maybe, but Maybe Not.

So If you've been around me for the past 7 weeks for any length of time, you will probably have already heard my "tummy woes". Can't eat, makes me hurt and want to puke, can't exercise because I do puke, sometimes bending over makes me puke...am tired..blah blah blah. I was told that it was most likely my gallbladder. Had an ultrasound done, and wow, looks like there might be some "crystals" in there. The next thing I knew I was in it for a HIDA scan: and if you don't know what it is, just know that it's awful. After my yucky scan, I was off to see the Surgeon who says: "you know you are one of those cases where we just can't put our finger on it. You have classic symptoms of gallbladder issues, but it's functioning at 100% and there are no "crystals" to be seen anywhere. I can remove it if you want, but can't guarantee that your problem will be fixed." I'm the type of girl who has to have a guarantee. If you aren't POSITIVE with what you are saying or doing...I don't want to play! Thanks very much, but I like my internal organs where they are, I would just like them to function and not make it impossible for me to do the things I love doing. My next step is a Stomach Study. That's scheduled for next week. I hear that it isn't "as bad" as the Radiation injection followed by medication that makes certain organs contract and you want to curl up in a ball, but can't because you have to lay completely still for an hour and fifteen minutes...(yes that's a HIDA scan) but you do have to drink chalky white stuff, lay in wierd positions, drink more, changed to funnier positions....and it takes oh only a mere 90 minutes! After that you ask? You guessed it! Surgical consult again! Sometimes I promise simple would be just fine in my world. For now I'm stuck with maybe....maybe not!

The not so fun post....

Yes, it has taken me some time to get to the point where I can talk about one of the saddest things in my world right now.

Yes, this is my beloved cat Kokoro. Most people have never seen her, let alone met her...she bonded to me, and that was it! Kokoro fought Inflammatory Bowel Disease her whole life, and on June 30th, 2009 I made the decision that she should be free from her pain. I LOVED this cat! She was sorely misunderstood most of the time...my mom said she "wasn't any fun" because she pretty much stayed away from everyone, except me. When I met her, she was a new mommy, with a litter of 4 living at my friend Beth's house. She being a bengal had so much wild in her, that she was quite skittish. I was there for about 10 minutes, before she decided to come and check me out..and then it was maybe another 5 minutes before she decided I was "ok". This in itself is amazing because she had seemed to already bond to one person-Beth's son, and Bengals are known to only bond to one person in their life. Over the next month or so, the more I was there, the more she hung around me, until it got to a point that you could tell she missed me when I was away, and when she heard my voice, she would meow so loud and so long, you thought she would pass out from lack of oxygen! The only thing that would stop her was me picking her up, loving her and telling her that I was "home" and it was "ok." That meow was the sign of a bond that never dimmed, only grew deeper and deeper. for years we went like this. Kokoro hiding under a bed until I came around, and then not wanting to leave my side when I would come over, or when she had yet another litter of kittens. She was the best mom! I knew how she felt, and what she was thinking, we had our own silent communication, especially when seh finally came to live with me over a year ago. Much comfort and love was shared between the both of us, and there are so many things that I am going to miss...the way she loved to have her nose rubbed, her silky soft fur, her meow, her love of laser lights...the sounds she made when she would chase and play....I could go on, but will not...I know she is safe and happy, and I hope she watches over me..I'm sure she does! There will never be another like her, and I am blessed that she was mine, even for a very short 6 years...she was worth it!

So, until we meet again, Sleep, Play, Hunt, and Run my sweet Kokoro. I sure do LOVE YOU!

Bummer :(

So, I've been so excited to go to Youth Conference, ever since I was asked to help take the girls. I was never able to go to anything like that when I was in Young Women's....and it looks like now, I won't be able to go again! My stupid Gallbladder apparently isn't working like it should, and I was told that at any point in time it could get REALLY bad, and to lay low for the next several days until my next appointment. So now...I am stuck at home (well actually I'm at work right now) not able to eat because it makes me sick, tired, cranky and well, bummed that I don't get to go have fun with the girls!

Ok.. Done with my pitty party now I can get something done, I hope!

Playing Catch Up!

Yes I am one of the worst "bloggers" ever. I know this, and quite honestly, I don't really care! Part of the problem is, I don't ever know what to say. With the amazing talent for writing that seems to flood my family...You'd think that I'd get some of it, but it's alright I'll use a different talent! So anyway, these are a few things that are on my list for upcoming, and past events....

Yes, that's right folks, I'm going through the Temple! Saturday July 11th, 2009, I will receive my endowments. I am so excited I can hardly stand it! Why am I going through now you ask? Well for no other reason than ME! It is time, I've wanted to go for a very long time, and the only thing that has ever stopped me before, was me. So now, I'm not stopping myself anymore. YAY!!!! Let's hear it for millions more temple sessions to follow!!!!!

July 9-11th, it is Youth Conference at USU. I get to drive some of the Young Women up there Thursday, and Hang out with them until Friday afternoon. Our stake dedicated Yesterday's fast to the youth having a fantastic spiritual experience up there. With all the hard work and effort put into this, it should be FANTASTIC!

That's Right, I'm addicted to So You Think You Can Dance! Now, I know that I can't dance, but I do know awesome talent when I see it, and these ladies and gentlemen are AWESOME! Some days I wish Young Women weren't on Wednesdays....Thank Heaven's for friends with Tivo :)



There are so many other things to blog about...but they will have to come later...One of these days I'll be done with the Catch Up game, and hopefully will be able to stay ahead!

I'm "bugged"

I finally received my body bugg in the mail this weekend!!!! YAY!!! Now I don't have to "guess" how many calories I'm burning, or consuming, or any of that. I just where this little thing on my arm, log my food- and it does all the rest of the work for me! Skinny me, here I come!!!!!

Blessed

Every day, more and more, I see people stop into my department, asking if we are by chance hiring. The economy is awful, and there are many people out there who cannot afford to put food on their tables. Yet, I sit here in front of my computer, thinking about what I am going to eat, and knowing that there IS food downstairs, and a roof over my head, and a warm place to sleep. I am BLESSED! No, my life is not perfect, no I do not have the luxuries that I would "love" to have...but I have the neccessities! I am so grateful for that, and I wish I could do more for those that don't have it as good as I do!

I have a lot to be thankful for, A LOT!!!!